Star Date 20040722mark1849

Allen July 22nd, 2004

Happy Fun Pundit has a list of the top 10 things he hates about star trek. Only those who watched the show need to go.

The Federation.
This organization creeps me out. A planet-wide government that runs everything, and that has abolished money. A veritable planetary DMV. Oh sure, it looks like a cool place when you’re rocketing around in a Federation Starship, but I wonder how the guy driving a Federation dump truck feels about it?

And everyone has to wear those spandex uniforms. Here’s an important fact: Most people, you don’t want to see them in spandex. You’d pay good money to not have to see them. If money hadn’t been abolished, that is. So you’re screwed.

Other Issues (my list):

  • Prime Directive (2nd issue)OK. If we’ve got the Prime Directive, then it seems to me that if you violate the prime directive (which seems to happen at least every week on TOS), some sort of issue should be made of it. Some heads should roll when the Prime Directive is violated.

    Kirk:It was about then that we hit this primitive planet with the Ogasmatron ray set to “get your mojo working” setting.
    Board of Inquiry:You ogasmatroned the entire planet? An entire planet of primitive people was subjected to this very high-tech device? What were you thinking!!!?!!
    Kirk:We were about to go on shore leave.
    Board of Inquiry:Oh, well. That’s OK then.

  • Dilithium Crystals
    Since they seem to be fritzing out all the time, perhaps it might be a good idea to keep a spare set around? That way you aren’t always having to rig up some replacement. I mean, cripes, I keep a spare tire in my car folks. You think you could do the same for a starship?
  • Makeup of Away Crews
    This has probably been mentioned before, but this is, after all, my list. Let’s see — you just came across a planet you know nothing about, that might hold terrible diseases, hostile aliens and unchlorinated water. Who should you send? A group of specialists trained for this task or your senior staff officers?

    • [Via Brain Fertilizer]

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